5 Things Not to Gift Your FIL

Buying a gift is a tedious job, and it becomes all the more difficult when you have to buy the same for your in-laws. I mean buying gifts for your own family members is a simple four step process.

Step 1- You identify what thing is you need most and wont get approval for buying from parents.

Step 2- Buy that thing, get it gift wrapped and write on tag “With love for Mummy/Papa – From You”

Step 3- Gift the packet to parents. Ask them to open it in front of you and see them sigh smile.

Step 4- Now take the gift and start using it, parents won’t use it anyways.

This is a sure shot process which works everytime. I have tried this multiple times like when I bought that expensive shaving foam for my mom and the Rayban sunglasses for my dad (who incidnetly wear eyesight glasses and cannot wear them). Now they both loved the gifts and they are being put to good use right there in my cupboard.

Father In Law
Image Courtesy: Google Images

But when it comes to in-laws the ball game changes entirely. The 4 step process mentioned above fails miserably. Well till now I am not able to come up with a process oriented approach for buying gifts for your in-laws. The reason is there is no trial run possibility as a failed trial might be fatal due to a external exterminator being active in the scene, better know as wifee.

So here yours truly comes up with 5 things which you should not gift your Father In Law(FIL)-

1- Life Insurance– Now this seems like a perfect gift, your insurance agent might convince with all kinds of benefits it entails and how it would bring huge benefits to you just by putting your name in the nominee section. It would seem like a good idea to buy that policy, name yourself as the Nominee pack it in the envelope and gift it to your FIL.Β  Don’t ever try it. Even if you go ahead and do it then it would be a good idea to get one insurance policy for yourself too, you now just in case….

2- Walking Cane– Now obviously when you are going to have a FIL, its sure he would be almost twice your age and would soon be getting older wiser. Now a walking cane is a thoughtful and a useful gift from a future perspective, your logic will totally support you on this. But then FIL might not be totally understand the usage of the cane and get inspired by the more elementary and traditional use of the cane which was more prominent in a school kind of setting. So for the health and safety hazards caused, this one is to be avoid.

3- 1 Year Subscription of Playboy Magazine– Now this seems to be the best gift for any man on this world. It also comes with a free inflatable full size love doll which might seem like a great gifting idea and value for money proposition. But this one you would be dead twice if you try you wifee is gonna kill you for sure and after that your mother in law would make your dead body alive and then kill it again. So don’t even dare to think about it.

4- The Wig– Now this also seems to be a perfect gift which has a high utility in present or foreseeable future. But the horrors of buying such a gift might haunt you as CliffΒ  Richard said “Be a Bachelor Boy until your dying day!!!”.

5- Passes for Invite Only Victoria’s Secret Party – I know this would apeal to you and him as much as the third one but then again this is one is equally fatal. You take your FIL with you to this paradise where almost naked Lingerie clad women will be walking and dancing around you but then you know the downside πŸ˜‰

So here are the 5 terrible gifting ideas when buying gift for your Father in Law.

32 comments on “5 Things Not to Gift Your FIL”

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  2. Deepti Reply

    he he..mum papa ko gift karne vala part was cute..:)..rather very cute….:)
    ab to twitter ki koi proxy bata de,…apart frm dabr..:((

    • Prats Reply

      @Vinni: Getting the Russian massage ladies home… Jesus this is better than all πŸ˜‰ I am sure your FIL gonna be one happy man πŸ™‚

  3. Sri Reply

    haha , funny post! I guess the probelm is whether to treat ur FIL like ur friend or like ur dad or both πŸ™‚

    • Prats Reply

      @Sri: No, I don’t think so that is the problem… the problem is that if you goof up with FIL you would be killed with a merciless killer living with you, fondly referred to as ‘WIFEEE’

  4. Miss M Reply

    Firstly, getting passes to a Victoria’s Secret after party is next to impossible BUT if you do get your hands on an extra pass, forget the FIL…SEND THEM TO ME!!!!

    • Prats Reply

      @Miss M: The Victoria’s Secret after party is not for the people who would waste it enjoying on the cloth, instead of enjoying what is inside the cloth(whatever little it is)

    • Prats Reply

      @Sri: No man, the panic has reduced. There has been some improvements, but still people are dying and new cases being reported.

  5. Meira Reply

    I always tell them I’m about to buy them something. They ‘chee chee’ the idea and tell me to get something for myself.

  6. indianhomemaker Reply

    When she was 10 my daughter gifted me a doll on her birthday πŸ™‚ I thought she thought if she liked it so much how could I not! Now this eye opening post has made me realise what her true intent was πŸ˜†

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