Category Archives: Rantings

10 Oxymorons I learnt in Two years

Three year back when I started preparing for the CAT examination, I came across the word called ‘oxymoron’. Initially I thought it would be a word describing a huge aggressive moron, someone like me. The dictionary had some other opinions and it said Conjoining contradictory terms (as in ‘deafening silence’). I never could really understand that why do one need to conjoin the contradictory terms. A year and a half into MBA and here are the 10 new oxymorons (for ppl like Irfan and Reens: I know it is a verb, but I don’t know the plural & noun form for oxymoron) I have learned during the “GRIND”.

1- Business School

2- MBA Education

3- Professional Relationship

4- Friendly Group Discussion

5- Cooperative Boss

6- MBA Babes

7- Interesting Subject

8- Great Faculty

9- Dream Company

10- Intelligent Question

11- This one is specially for my SIBM mates- Reena Sharma

For anyone of you who have a doubt or an argument that anyone of these is not an oxymoron may feel free to comment object. If you want to call me because I just remember one more of it, which speaks of me – Receptive Person.

Mailing Blues

I want to thank all my friends and other unknown people who have forwarded chain letters to me in 2003, 2004 & 2005.

Because of your kindness:

* I stopped drinking Coca-Cola after I found out that it’s good only for removing toilet stains.

* I stopped going to the movies for fear of sitting on a needle infected with AIDS.

* I smell like a wet dog since I stopped using deodorants because they cause cancer.

* I don’t leave my car in the parking lot or any other place and sometimes I even have to walk about 7 blocks for fear that someone will drug me with a perfume sample and try to rob me.

* I also stopped answering the phone for fear that they may ask me to dial a stupid number and then I get a phone bill from hell with calls to Uganda, Singapore and Tokyo.

* I also stopped drinking anything out of a can for fear that I will get sick from the rat faeces and urine.

* When I go to parties, I don’t look at any girl, no matter how hot she is, for fear that she will take me to a hotel, drug me, then take my kidneys and leave me taking a nap in a bathtub full of ice.

* I also donated all my savings to the Amy Bruce account. A sick girl! that was about to die in the hospital about 7,000 times. (Poor girl! she’s been 7 since 1993…)

* I went bankrupt from bounced checks that I made, expecting the $15,000 that Microsoft and AOL were supposed to send me (when I participated in their special-mail program) would arrive soon.

* My free Nokia phone never arrived and neither did the free passes for a paid vacation to Disneyland .

* Still open to help someone from Bulgaria who wants to use my account to transfer his uncle’s property of some hundred millions $.

* Made some Hundred wishes before forwarding those Dalai Lama, Ganesh Vandana, Tirupathi Balaji pics etc.. now most of those “Wishes” are already married (to someone else)

IMPORTANT NOTE:
If you do not copy this text and e-mail it to at least 41829137600 people in the next 10 seconds, a bird will sh*t on your head today at 04.00 hour 5 min 6 sec

Now Give me a break !!!

*This post is not an original creation of the blog owner.

Slippers Over Books

Amazon.com has been a success story for all the supporters of IT & web based selling models from all over the world. In my one year of MBA I have heard a lot of about Amazon.com and was very appreciative of this company which is the hallmark of existence of a virtual world. Amazon.com has been a name which fascinated me for all these years and every time I typed the URL of the website I was greeted by a sophisticated interface.

For me Amazon.com was worlds’ biggest and the best online “BOOK STORE”. Recently an article in Washington Post made me realize and accept a change which was gradually happening and I never realized it. Amazon is changing its business model. They are no more a book store, they are aspiring to be a one stop shop. The title bar on my browser says “Amazon.com: Online Shopping for Electronics, Apparel, Computers, Books, DVDs & more”. The interface has changed; it no longer looks like an online bookstore. It is more of a general mart, a variety store or a hypermarket kind of structure.

I had strong inhibitions that this strategy of leveraging the brand, would succeed. As a consumer, Amazon for me does not relate to Online store, but an Online Book Store. The worst part is when I open the site the display greeted me with a display which was not books, stationary, DVDs etc but some pair of Slippers. I can’t believe that a person can have same associations with a place where he buys his slippers and the place where he buys his books. According to me the way Amazon is going it is headed towards doom. Because it contradicts a basic law of branding “The Law of Expansion” which says the power of a brand is inversely proportional to its scope. That is trying to be all things to all the people undermines the power of a brand. The strength of a brand lies in being synonymous with a single category. Amazon is a typical example of an excellent brand violating the law of expansion and losing the brand value. The same can be evident from the earnings and stock prices from past one year which have seen a major drop. It would have been a more practical and beneficial solution for Amazon if they would have made a new brand from scratch. Amazon for customers relates to a category as an online book store and can never be a retail mart.

Even Amazon is now aware of the dropping brand equity and customer response. They have been trying hard to regain their positioning buy organizing online shows of Bob Dylan and now lately it has decided to make his foray into movie business by buying right to make movie on a best seller novel “The Stolen Child”. This comes in the light when Amazon’s stocks have shown a dip of 60% over previous year. I still have strong feelings regarding that will these kind of desperate measures be able to rescue Amazon, from the bear ride it is now on. Will the strategy of diversifying from books to a store of 34 different product categories pay off in a long run. All these questions remained unanswered and probably time can be the only teller to it but as of now the situation doesn’t seem to be in favour of Amazon.

Of Betrayal in Love, Trust & Relatioships

I feel shocked, there has to be an element of trust in every relationship. I have never been betrayed so badly, my trust has never gone for toss with such scorn, and it hurts. Yes it hurts badly. I was one of the early adopters of the product called “Soft Drinks” or “Aerated Drinks”. They have been a part of my life since past 15 years, they have been as close to me, and had replaced water to quite an extent in my lifestyle. I still remember my order when I used to visit the Dhaba( a small food joint, by the highway side) and my usual order used to be “Special tadke wali Dal, Butter Roti and Pepsi” which used to make my dinner night after night in my days of engineering college. How I used to be a lover of soft drinks, a loyalist to their product and as well as brand.

I stand here now, feeling betrayed, dumped for the most selfish purpose in life, making money. I always trusted them bestowed my love on them, and all they did was to play on my life, my quality of my life. They lied to me about everything, I gave them a place in my life and they made money out of my cost. Last evening the highlights flashing on the TV, told me that how badly Pepsi & Coca-Cola had treated me. What they had been doing to me behind my back. I was always told that I was being provided was a world class product, a quality product. I always believed that I was getting into a relationship with these products as an advocate for their quality. I never believed then 3 years from now, when they told me that I was being fed on pesticide. I never believed but yesterday I knew that I was dumped in love, I was used, and my trust was compromised.

It’s so bad that I was being fed on pesticide that too 24 times what was permissible for keeping my health. It was like you were blinded in love and your lover is out to kill you. I don’t know how much I have lost in this relationship, how much my quality and length of life have been compromised. But I would follow a belief that has always guided me through bad relationships “Relationships are like Investment, Get out of a bad one as soon as possible”. Now that my courtship with aerated drinks is over and the blindfold removed, I could see the things clearly and have a determination in my heart that I am not going to allow them to play with my emotions and my life anymore, they don’t deserve someone as loyal as me and I am not going to be associated with Cyprians like coke and Pepsi anymore!!!!

RESERVATIONS: Unanswered Questions

I was in class XII, and I decided to fill in the form for Joint Entrance Exam for the IIT’s, and there was a column called caste and I went up to my father because I didn’t know which circle to mark. My father told me about caste system and the reason why the column was there in the first place. Nothing wrong but a young guy knows that something called caste system exists and is something beyond the civics and moral science’s books. Then we all gave the exam and when the results came there was a separate lists for some of my friends…again the same question why??? The answer is they belong to a different caste and typically addressed as scheduled castes. So now a person who just knew the people as classmates, friends, learns a new term for some of his friends. So to the extent my experience goes I feel that reservations are creating the gap more than they fill. But this wasn’t enough, when I took admission in one of the government college and was staying in the hostel, I wanted to stay with one of my friend and wanted a room change, then I was informed by our warden that according to the rules the room has to be distributed as one general candidate, one scheduled caste/tribe and one OBC sounds damn funny. Since the person I wanted to shift with was also a scheduled caste the change did happened and he is my best friend still not because of his caste but because when he became my friend I was not aware that there is something as caste and there is nothing as good as pure friendship. This was not enough soon another phase started when the ragging started; the people were ill treated by the other caste seniors and all this because of the reservations. Till now even I became so proficient that I could tell people of their castes by their last names. Why all this hatred, I could never understand why??? The width kept on increasing when there were caste meets being attended by teachers themselves and we also got books form seniors based on our castes. I am really sure that this would not have been the intent when the reservation was introduced in our constitution. But the things have changed now and it is doing more harm than good. I am not against any caste or community but I have a few doubts and questions which the present form of reservation fails to answer may be at the time when this was planned it had a very valid existence but right now I find no reasons to support it. Some of the questions which my mind asks are-

1- The objectives of reservation were the up liftment of the people who were neglected by the country and the society and were the part of the country. Now first question is caste the only bases to identify the inequalities. Is there a possibility that someone who is also suffering from similar cause but doesn’t belong to a particular caste? If yes then does that person deserve an address to his cause on the similar scales? Is there a possibility that a person who is not suffering from the inequalities gets undue benefit? If yes then the first thing is the system is not perfect and there are flaws and a better system can be brought in place. So the system can’t be assumed sacrosanct.

2- Now it has been more than fifty years since we have been implementing this system. Has it really been removing inequalities and poverty and economic gap at the rate 22.5% year on year? I don’t believe this because I don’t think that our population is growing at this rate and there has to be some visible convergence then. Anyways there is a 22.5% there is often news flashes that someone strips a dalit lady, and makes her roam around the village. How would reservation take care of this I couldn’t see an alternative? Then you will tell me that there is dalit utpeedan act (I am not sure about of the act) but why??? I may sound stupid but my question is why??? If this is done to any of the person of this country the accused should be hanged because it violates the fundamental law of equality (why one more act to specify the caste of the victim, may be make him aware that she can blame her origin for whatever has happened to her). Second is poverty and economic gap, which is one thing which is addressed by reservation but to what extent. Does the system has proper checks, whether the benefits are reaching the needful and every needful is getting benefits. I still remember that the fee paid in our engineering college was refunded by the government for the scheduled caste/tribe students. And almost every scheduled caste/tribe student claimed it, though it was meant only for the economically weaker section of the society and the people availing it were mostly the affluent people who spent the money to purchase bikes, mobile phones, digital cameras and things which were distantly not related to the education on the other hand there were students from the so called upper caste but facing economic crisis at their home. They could just curse the system and expect that might be some banks give them loans which they would repay when they will start their lives. Not fair!!! is all I can say.

3- Then the measures are very qualitative, inequality, social, economic all these things are mentioned but there are no quantitative measures to check the real effectiveness. What is social inequality? Every one can stand anywhere, eat and drink anywhere, study anywhere, irrespective of any other thing except that he should be an Indian citizen. But what else can two people be equal socially. How do we found out that we have attained social equality? How??? What is our end result??? How can we be sure that reservation has done its job? Or may be it is not doing its job there are no metrics of these factors. Economic Equality is one of the most talked about factor, what is the economic equality… When every one owns the same amount of money than I can assure you reservation or no reservation this wont be possible. Or may be when the percentage of people below the line of poverty will be same for the every caste? Is that the metrics but do we track is reservation decreasing the people below the poverty line from the scheduled castes and tribe year on year and by how much, if it is reducing at a rate which is less than the growth of the population then it should be abolished as it not an effective way and something else should be tried out. Anything but there should be a clearly defined metrics and that too not it terms of time but in terms of result. So the reservation is not at all GOAL ORIENTED.

there are 100s of other questions in my mind but in the end all the things boil down to some of the few important that we as a nation decide something and take step and it doesn’t even relates to our goal and we can’t even measure how good or bad we have done for the country. Then I remember an old story of the cocoon which was struggling to become the butterfly and one of the children filled with emotions for the little creature and helped him out but the little creature never had the wings strong enough to fly. Are we doing the same to our fellow brothers by providing them help in their struggle? Especially in the light of the American society where the social and economic inequality between blacks and whites has been addressed very well over the years, also went through a similar situation from which we are going, there was a strong wave to get reservation for blacks during the reign of Abraham Lincoln, but it was turned down…and rest is a history..

So all I can say is that reservation is not the solution to the problems of the people as a matter of fact it is more of a gimmick which was once introduced with most sincere of motives but later turned into gimmick by the corrupt and polluted intentions of the Indian polity….

FAREWELL TO THE COUNCIL

The day has come finally, my life has decided to take a turn. After one of the best staged dramas of my life, of course this one was directed by me. The final act has been done and I stand outside the “student driven” system of the institute. It has been enough of driving for past one year. The ride was fun with lots of fun people coming around but the final act could have been so rewarding I would have never thought. I always believed that MBA is a place to have fun you dont make friends who would stand by you through your life, obviously not when you look the cut throat competition which prevails. But somehow life is to o keen to teach me all her antithesis of my beliefs. This time by giving me people whom I would cherish throughout my life.

Now there would be no workload, no rushing, no hate mails from Reena and Disha, no meetings, no other side of the lab, no Yahoo access in the college. No emergencies, no lab shifts, no conking printers, no fading WiFi everything is gone and all is left is me with and experience which I would never forget, with friends would remain there forever in my life…..Bbye Council.



And for you two:
I’m never gonna say goodbye
Cos I never wanna see you cry
I swore to you my love would remain
And I swear it all over again and I
I’m never gonna treat you bad
Cos I never wanna see you sad
I swore to share your joy and your pain
And I swear it all over again

Sudden Realizations

This is one of the most costly blog entry I have ever made. Why? I am sitting in a class and as usual the professor sucks and now when I did some homework that what is it costing me to be here and listen to all this worthless nonsense is a fortune. It pains and trust me, it pains really hard. You know sometimes I wonder when I feel like this what the people who were working in really goood organizations and left their jobs, pay, office everything in hope to come here that they will get some decent value with a lot of business sense. You know why I feel MBA SUCKS is because this is what I am paying for my MBA-

Annual Fees in SIBM Rs90,000.00

Cost of laptop on account of 60% depreciation Rs30,000.00

Annual Salary which I would have got at TCS Rs206,000.00
(Micro Eco told me this is Opportunity Cost)

Interest @ Rate of 5% compunded 6 monthly) Rs16,503.75

Total Annual Cost I am paying to study at SIBM Rs342,503.75

Monthly cost of MBA Rs28,541.98

No. of Pd’s in a month (Ideal Case) 144

Cost per Hour of every lecture at SIBM Rs198.21

So I am writing this blog for Rs. 198.21/hr andd trust me I would have really appreciated that I would have soemthing of business sense out of this money but whatever is going in this class I find writing this blog far more value adding as compared to listening to the class. To add to pain one of my very good friends sitting just at my back finds his interest in reading what I am writing instead of the class and for him this costs increases to Rs. 346.56 / lecture as he left a job after working for two years. I GUESS THE HONEYMOON IS OVER. And everyone is waiting for the MBA to get over and rock in the real corporate world to prove their mettle. Adieu!!!

Summers in December

My summers have finally arrived in the starting of winters. Yes, I finally got an offer for my summer placements from Tata Teleservices. Today was a rocking start as our IT team had to cover 5 presentations for the day. My day started with a usual run between our IT LAB which is on the fourth floor to our auditorium which is on ground floor but we have to climb down to the basement for the entrance. So amongst all this chaos of mics audio cables and LCD’s I attended a sleep inducing ppt trying to be awake. Soon after the ppt I was told that I was shortlisted for NDTV process and I rushed through the lab and the room no. 13 to check the details. My pulse was rocking and I sat with Vikram and Vishay discussing questions like what are my strengths and weakness and why I want to leave IT and join media (though we framed a decent answer but still I can’t think of a valid reason that why on earth would anyone like to leave an IT company to join a TV channel) and then after this brief session of introspection I hobbled up to the lab (don’t ask me that how I manage to keep my fat when I climb so Many stairs, you can do your PhD on that) and struggled with the computer to get all relevant data about their Mcap, CAGR, Market Share, Competition, Industry Analysis etc. I came down mugging all these figures. At that time perhaps I knew the figures like they were the only thing that would be asked by them. There to my surprise on the board was my name making a proud announcement that I have “cracked Summers” with Tata Teleservices!!!!
Wow life rocks, things changed I went like an Idiot all over the college telling people as if I got a jackpot. Finally I reached the second ppt and then after all that I kept my promise and I brought cake for my IT team , I was so clever that I brought chocolate as I like more than Black forest and as a perfect team does they made it a point that all that cake should be as close to my mouth and my hairs and the ordeal continued until there wasn’t a place left to smear the cake. after then we had a lot of chit chat. Well the day was a rocking one. I hope what tomorrow has in store for me. Till then Sayonara!!!