The year 2010 is coming to a close, this year has been a year of achievements amidst disasters. Now given the fact that achievements harbor jealousy, while the disasters harbor jeer, jibes and sarcasm; I believe it would be appropriate to stick to the later while writing this post.
So talking about the disasters I got married early this year which in itself a disaster of the century. This also strikes me out of dating/scoring with any female I know *sigh* and the little thing called wedding ring stuck on my finger makes sure I am repelled by the ones I don’t know *bigger sigh*. Now most of you would be thinking that why I won’t remove the wedding ring and get back to the game. Well the lovely Wifee & the in-laws ensured that I am showered with so much love which coincidentally wrapped in loads of trans-fat leaving a tyre around my waist and the finger so thick that I can’t seem to take out the ring without slicing off my finger.
As I complete my digressions with knick knacks of the Gupta household; 2010 wasn’t only the year of my personal disasters but the entire country joined me in the unprecedented series of disasters. We had the CWG sham scam of 70,000 crores and the 2G Spectrum scam of 1,76,000 crores. I mean I don’t even know how many effin’ zeroes are present in either of those figures. And to top that out the person who is in charge of the cabinet where these scams happened, our beloved Prime Minister Manmohan Singhji (MMS), wants to be Caesar’s wife. As if being Rahul Gandhi’s proxy wife wasn’t enough he also wants to be Caesar’s wife too. My heart goes out for Gursharan Kaur(GK) that she has to go through all this, from what I have heard she is strong valued lady who still manages the MMS household under her tight and able reins.
The word is that the following conversation took place between the PM and his wife last week-
MMS: What is for dinner tonight?
GK: Caesar Salad.
MMS: You are still stuck on the Caesar thing I didn’t mean it literally. It was just a figure of speech.
GK: Yes, Yes as if I don’t know you, one white firangi womam and you become a puppet. 6 years puppeting after Sonia wasn’t enough you find another one that too someone else’s wife
MMS: Oh god! It’s just an idio…m
GK: Don’t you dare call me an idiot, I did a google image search on Caesar and his wife he is some Roman general and his wife is also a pretty blonde.
MMS: Enough of it, why are we having salad? I thought we were supposed to have chicken do pyaza.
GK: At Rs. 70/Kg we cannot afford onions, so chicken do pyaza is cancelled.
MMS: What do you mean we cannot afford onions I am the Prime Minister of the country.
GK: So what? Are you a part of the 2G scam….
MMS: No I am clean and I am above suspicion like the Caes…..and I am ready to appear before the PAC but JPC is not necessary on this particular event.
GK: You are not addressing a press conference or media. I am your wife. So did A. Raja gave you any money?
MMS: No, I think he gave it all to the Karunanidhi family. You know they bought Spice Jet airlines. He is not even from congress no so I hardly have any control over him.
GK: Ok! Did Suresh Kalmadi give you any money, he is from your party?
MMS: No, whatever he gave Rahul ji took it away saying he will use it in Bihar and the rest Suresh kept with himself.
GK: So how do you think we can afford Onions.
MMS: Very true, but I can always ask Sharad Pawar to give us some. I hear that he is hoarding tones of it to keep the prices artificially high.
GK: I am not sure if he will give you any, but yeah If you can ask Sonia to exert some pressure he might cave in. But then if we are found in possession of Onions when the CBI, PAC, JPC or whatever comes to our house they would conclude that you took a cut in all the scams which are coming on TV these days.
MMS: Yes true. Lets have salad, anyways at this age salad is good for health too. I have to keep in good health; given the election results in Bihar from Rahulji, I might get a shot for the third term as a PM if the congress wins the elections again.
Disclaimer: The post is a figment of an imagination and the above mentioned statements might not be entirely factual. So if you can’t take some fun lightly please hit the close button on your browser.