Technologically Challange(d)

Now don’t get me wrong with this post, I am one of the guys who are in love with the technology. All the girls in my life have been extremely jealous of the special attention received by the gadgets and this includes my mom who being sheer jealous of my deep love for my samurai video game when she wanted me to be hooked to ECO-101, she threw it out of the window. Though she claims it was for my good and out of respect I don’t disagree.

I always had a fear that one day some girl would be hot & happening enough to sway my mind of my little gizmo toys. Today Alee finally managed to pull it off in my life. I shared the following conversation and for a change I was speaking today for the most part (Mostly because she was engrossed in making a power point presentation. Which might be a raison d’être for my thoughts)

So we started ….

Me: Do you actually believe that technology makes our life simpler?

Alee: Yyyyess!!! (Afraid is he going to start again)

Then I started….

You know what, the thing with technology is so weird. It simply seems to be way out of purpose. You know two decades back we didn’t have the computers so common and alike. People used to rely on written or typed stuff. Given the fact that people used to either write or type the documents our regular documents used to be not more than 4-5 pages. The recipient of the document used to respect them and used to read them properly. ( I still remember my parents telling me stories of commendable people who would send the letter back marking grammatical errors and spelling mistakes to people and they were expected to correct them and learn from it, I sometimes get scared what will I teach my children when you type and there is red line underneath the word you just ignore it. BUT DON’T FORGET TO PRESSS F7 in the end before sending)

Then came the era of word processors when people could actually type in length and can get a printout the process was easier and supposedly less time consuming but was negated by a direct increase in the page count of the document. Then came Google and the documents swelled to unfathomable proportions and today even a 12 year old spans his project to volumes of literature.

I still remember the first class of my MBA they taught me how to write an executive summary. The objective of the executive summary is to give the insight to the reader in one or two paragraphs, as no one has time to read through the loads you would have prepared. My inquisitive mind when asked “If no one is going to read them anyway then what’s the point of having it in the first place. Why just don’t submit and executive summary only?” was pushed aside by the roar of the professor. Then we learnt the art of Power Point, you submit the 1000 page document which no one can/want/will read so you come up with bullet points to push you point in to the target’s head ( I guess that’s why they called it a power point). Amazed by the ability and capability of the power point the whole world got into it. Now if you find a power point ending within 15 slides you know it is forward messages with either some cute chicks in the night wear or some catastrophe which you can avoid by pressing the forward button on your outlook.

I mean come on with all the information in this world who has the time to actually go through it. Being into ERP business I sometimes wonder does a CEO of a company actually knows that the average time to figure out the complete capabilities of an ERP system exceeds multiple times the shelf life of the CEOs. But being a quick learner he hires someone from the breed of hardworking people called MBA’s and makes them work on another most powerful analysis tool which is blessed upon the human race- Microsoft Excel.

The poor chap burns midnight oil and struggles day in and day out with huge loads of documents/numbers data tweaking a bit and a byte there, trying to give a few more degrees of elevation to the sweet little things on the excel work sheet known as – YoY Profit, YoY Revenue, QoQ Profit, QoQ Revenue and blah and more blah. All his existence resting on .0001 degrees of elevation and a 150 page document specifying that why the .0001 degree is justified. This bible of 150 pages which is dispatched to the intended recipient called shareholders (which essentially are people like me, I mean people who have De-mat account J ) who are supposed to read them. However, even I don’t have the time to read 150 pages, so essentially one fine day my mom walks in and the 150 page bible is ripped page by page to place in the casserole to provide a base below the paper napkins to keep the water of the food. You know this kind of paper works too well mom says. Pity the guy who slogged his backside for that elevation.

Hmmmpff and I didn’t stop here but went on my take on mobile technology, more about it in a later post. But I must say power point does one commendable thing, giving poor guy a chance to speak more than the lady at least for the time when she is trying to work on another cent of elevation…..

Alee you can do wonders, I can’t believe I spoke so much that too against….Sniff Sniff

Where is this smoke coming from, Oh darling you are so sexy, Love your attitude, Love your name Dell Latitude D520, and your bright 15″ wide eyes. You know that i didn’t meant everything I said. You know you can keep me hooked with you for ages (Okay! you just have to keep you WiFi on baby)

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