When I look forward to the issues and really think about it, education seems to be one of the biggest ironies of the life of my friend. Actually not only she but I am sure there would be hundred of other women who would be under going the same thing for lack of courage and independence in social structure and may be men too. One of the better students in the country, an engineer from a fairly good institute and an MBA from a renounced Institute in her profile. She after all this knows what is good for her and what she wants out of life. 24 years of life with 6 years of a technical and professional education has given her a lot of perspectives about life. With roots descending to an unknown village in Uttar Pradesh, she has seen a lot of life and is very competitive in all spheres of life.
I always believed education could bring changes in people that made them great as they were but I guess I was wrong when I see her plight. Despite knowing what is good for her, what she wants out of life. She will start making compromises in her life, for her orthodox family has never heard of a women who can have her own will in the family. So how can she be spared? Is it not the Males who spent most of life in that village know how she should spend her life, they already know what is good for her. If she doesn’t agrees may be she can be killed, or her mother for that matter. Does it makes a difference? Can education help u save from the bullet or a give you courage to stand against one. I think her mother did really a good job to make sure that she studies so hard and go high above all expectation, but she really forgot to teach her to stand for what she thought was right.
The interesting fact is that all her education has made her plight more unbearable, a girl who has probably never seen a school will never be able to sure what was right for her and what was not. But girls like these will always know that what is happening to them, what has happened to them is wrong and they will live with it all their life. They will do what the males of the family wanted them to do and at the end may be tell their daughters too that they should follow the same league. Was all that education able to brought a change? Wasn’t one of the finest minds in the country is going to be wasted, and deprived a right of choice? Does she actually have a say in her own life or family? There can not be a more waste of education than this for the lack of courage. I have no answers to these questions to help my friend. But I wish the only solution is a pinch of courage, to sit down and listen and then stand up and say that I am what I am and I know how to handle my life and I need to take charge, and my Time is NOW!!! There are scary thoughts when I think of this, but it is still better than a life suffering and living like hell for rest of her life agonizing every minute for the single minute when she had a choice to stand up.